As Silas Clark lays with me on my porch chair, I think about how I can build resilience in this little puppy. He’s 12 weeks old now and I want him to be able to handle life with a bounce-back mentality. If a dog gets angry with him, I want him to not hold onto that for the rest of his dog relationships. If he gets nervous in the bath, I want him to move on and be able to do baths going forward without fear.
As a trainer, I see dogs with fear, anxiety and reactivity on the regular. It’s easy for me to worry that he’ll become one of those things, so I want to retrain my brain to think of his resilience alongside his fear. Resilience isn’t built from having no hard things in life, rather it’s built from having a hard thing happen and recovering well.
That said, ideally the trials for our puppies are minor, not major. But through them, they learn that life carries on, that good times are ahead and that they are ok. They don’t have to be afraid of the next bath or dog or loud truck.
How do we build resilience in our dogs?
Expose them to things, places, experiences, people in small amounts. I often hear from clients, well I thought it was positive but now I’m not sure. For this reason, always take treats. If your dog is taking treats, that is a sign they are not too worried. Treats can also help a dog have a better experience (I mean, wouldn't you like some popcorn with your movie?)
Make a list of the things you’d like them to think are normal. For me, this includes nail trims, baths, other dogs, kids of all ages, busy Kirkwood, tall people (my 6’7” friend came over last weekend).
Using a calendar, map out when your puppy will be 10 weeks, 12 weeks, 14 weeks and 16 weeks. Then overlay important experiences - ideally exposing for the first time(s) before 12 weeks.
Consider what needs more support/time. Silas has had one bath and he wasn’t a fan. He had an offer of peanut butter and chicken (his favorites) and said no to both. So we will be doing another bath in the next day or two to help him have a better experience.
Planning ahead isn’t natural for some of us. BUT it can pay off for years with your puppy. These first four months are critical to building a resilient dog who can enjoy all the things that will be part of your and your family’s life.
Not sure how to do this? Reach out for help here.